Wagstaff joined the firm during the dog-eat-dog '90s and rose swiftly through the junior levels with terrier-like tenacity and by successfully sniffing out new areas of business. The Firm's anti-squirrel litigation is up 57% since 1998. Cases involving cat litter and non-scooped remnants are at a five-year high. Attributes his success to good grooming, dropping dead birds in partners' laps during meetings and having adorable, soft fur under his chin.
Hobbies/Interests
Leafing through tort reform texts and then drooling on laughable inaccuracies; sleeping.
Family
One human. I have trained it to throw a stick when I retrieve one and to continuously open and/or close doors whenever it watches HBO.
Best Experience at the Firm
"There was this cat that got trapped in the photocopier room. How I laughed! The door closes inwards. What a chump."
Worst Experience at the Firm
"I got trapped in the photocopier room. The door closes inwards. Someone needs to get that fixed. It must be a fire hazard or something."
Advice to Law Students
"Don't pee on your own lawn. Seriously. That's not a metaphor. It ruins the grass."
